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Comments

  • You know the guy that was in the ring? Turns out the one he fought with was a bunch of bull.

  • The most beautiful makeup of a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy.

  • WELCOME TO PAGE 974 !!

  • QUOTES

    "The way to happiness is: keep your heart free from hate, your mind from worry. Live simply, give much. Fill your life with love. Do as you would be done by."

  • To the 20 year old girl who wrote an essay claiming she is too pretty to be allowed to lead a normal life:Same.

  • QUOTES

    "With mindfulness, strive on."

  • QUOTES

    "Chaos is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence."

  • QUOTES

    "If the problem can be solved why worry? If the problem cannot be solved worrying will do you no good."

  • A mother makes her son intelligent in 20 years, but a woman can make him stupid in 30 seconds.

  • QUOTES

    "Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world."

  • I asked my date to meet me at the gym today. She didn't show up. That's when I knew we weren't gonna work out.

  • In the competition of female logics, a random number generator won.

  • Why did the toilet roll down the hill? To get to the bottom!

  • Woke up early to go for a run and got as far as still laying here.

  • By the cup of Nescafé even the most secret thoughts turn into words, and by the bottle of vodka – into actions.

  • She's as smart as bait.

  • What has four legs, is big, green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A pool table.

  • Ladies dating a short guy is fun until you can't find him at the club and you don't have taxi money to go home.

  • Join The Army, visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.

  • Uber lost over a billion dollars in the last six months so they're asking their drivers to check between the seat cushions.

  • Whenever I see you there is a smile on my face. And by smile I meant I laugh.

  • Easy to Easy is not easy.

  • Winter is natures way of telling you to polish.

  • Middle age is when your old classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don't recognize you.

  • Cats are a great pet if you've ever wanted convenient access to a friend that hurts your feelings.

  • Hi, welcome to dating. These are your two options:
    1. Stay together forever
    2. Break up
    No pressure.

  • To avoid a collision I ran into the other car.

  • Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer... I saw the video... we need to talk.

  • It's a sin to love another's wife

  • I think therefore I can't get anything done.

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