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SCARY ONE-LINERS
I have never tasted this meat! Whose is... Where is my daughter?
SCARY ONE-LINERS
She wondered why she was casting two shadows. After all, there was only a single light bulb.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
She asked why I was breathing so heavily. I wasn’t.
Hi.
Waiting for my double bandwidth.
My order : #1715107831
SCARY ONE-LINERS
I’m sorry Tommy but we’ve got to eat, I promise I’ll make this as painless as I can.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
I died, I feel myself floating up away from my body. Then I look down and see my body there, then, it wakes up.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
She put her hand in his hair when he was lying on her lap, then she moved that hand on his neck, released him from the mortal world and welcomed him to her own world.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
I need to make this look like he just died in his sleep, otherwise my son won't ever trust me with my other grandkids.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
The grinning face stared at me from the darkness beyond my bedroom window. I live on the 14th floor.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
She was walking down the road at night when she heard laughing voices coming from a closed cemetery.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
But Doctor, how can she be pregnant, she's been in a coma for a year?
SCARY ONE-LINERS
It's been almost a week since I was bitten, and three days since I turned, but I can't fight this insatiable hunger any longer; and my family looks tastier with each passing moment.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
Your hands are in the air, you are waiting to be cuffed, but the officer smiles, takes aim, and speaks into his radio, “Suspect is attempting to resist - I THINK HES GOT A GUN!”
SCARY ONE-LINERS
The sudden constriction of his throat had Santa Claus struggling to breathe as he stared in horror at the half eaten cookie in his hand.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
The boy sat at the back of the classroom, he didn't own a watch, but everyone could hear the ticking.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
I can’t move, breathe, speak or hear and it’s so dark all the time - if I knew it would be this lonely, I would have been cremated instead.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
She regain consciousness to be found in warm water mixed up with onions, garlic and tomatoes.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
He lost all of his excitement for his marriage when he got an RSVP from his dead ex.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
Housesitting alone isn't so bad as long as they have a dog, after all, what else could that scratching noise be?
SCARY ONE-LINERS
I cleaned my whole apartment looking for that noise, as it turns out the scratching was in my ear all along.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
The chief looked at the rooky's blood flecked badge and told the sergeant, "It was worth it, just make it look like the protestors did it."
SCARY ONE-LINERS
Growing up, I always thought water was meant to be red-tinted.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
I looked out my window. The stars had gone away.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
Growing up with cats and dogs, I am used to the sounds of scratching. But now that I live alone the sound is unsettling.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
He had no way of knowing that the tip of one of the blender blades had come loose until he gulped down the last of his smoothie.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
They told me I wasn't a werewolf and said that it was impossible - but if I'm not a werewolf, then what made me kill all those kids?
SCARY ONE-LINERS
She went upstairs to check on her sleeping toddler and found that the window was open and the bed was empty.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
It sat on my shelf, with thoughtless porcelain eyes and the prettiest pink doll dress I could find. Why did she have to be born still.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
He always insisted his elder brother to play chess with him, especially from the day he was killed and was feeling extremely lonely.
SCARY ONE-LINERS
I just heard a knocking sound coming from inside my fridge.