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The Eternal Väinämöinen -- Seedboxes Starting From 1.99€/Month or 6.99€/Year -- 700 Years Give Away

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Comments

  • LET-5000MRR-BELL-RUNG-YABS #73822

    # ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## #
    #              Yet-Another-Bench-Script              #
    #                     v2026-10-31                    #
    # https://github.com/masonr/yet-another-bench-script #
    # ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## #
    
    Wed Nov 11 05:03:22 AM EET 2026
    
    Basic System Information:
    ---------------------------------
    Uptime     : 2 days, 8 hours, 11 minutes
    Processor  : Intel(R) N100
    CPU cores  : 4 @ 1749.170 MHz
    AES-NI     : ✔ Enabled
    VM-x/AMD-V : ✔ Enabled
    RAM        : 31.1 GiB
    Swap       : 54.7 GiB
    Disk       : 118.2 TiB
    Distro     : Debian GNU/Linux 12 (bookworm)
    Kernel     : 6.1.0-54-amd64
    VM Type    : NONE
    IPv4/IPv6  : ✔ Online / ❌ Offline
    
    IPv4 Network Information:
    ---------------------------------
    ISP        : Magna Capax Finland Oy
    ASN        : AS203003 Magna Capax Finland Oy
    Host       : Magnacapax
    Location   : Helsinki, Uusimaa (18)
    Country    : Finland
    
    fio Disk Speed Tests (Mixed R/W 50/50) (Partition /dev/md2):
    ---------------------------------
    Block Size | 4k            (IOPS) | 64k           (IOPS)
      ------   | ---            ----  | ----           ---- 
    Read       | 347.13 KB/s     (84) | 4.42 MB/s       (67)
    Write      | 365.56 KB/s     (89) | 4.69 MB/s       (71)
    Total      | 712.70 KB/s    (173) | 9.12 MB/s      (138)
               |                      |                     
    Block Size | 512k          (IOPS) | 1m            (IOPS)
      ------   | ---            ----  | ----           ---- 
    Read       | 27.78 MB/s      (52) | 34.00 MB/s      (32)
    Write      | 29.71 MB/s      (56) | 37.08 MB/s      (35)
    Total      | 57.49 MB/s     (108) | 71.08 MB/s      (67)
    
    iperf3 Network Speed Tests (IPv4):
    ---------------------------------
    Provider        | Location (Link)           | Send Speed      | Recv Speed      | Ping           
    -----           | -----                     | ----            | ----            | ----           
    Clouvider       | London, UK (10G)          | 2.05 Gbits/sec  | 941 Mbits/sec   | 33.4 ms        
    Leaseweb        | Singapore, SG (10G)       | 1.72 Gbits/sec  | 1.19 Gbits/sec  | 174 ms         
    Leaseweb        | NYC, NY, US (10G)         | 2.04 Gbits/sec  | 969 Mbits/sec   | 95.9 ms
    
    
    
    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 1410710930

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • @untitled said:
    Hi everybody,
    How is the transfer, read and write speed on the Storage Boxes 10G? Does anybody recommend them? Let's say in comparison with the one from Hetzner?
    I had a storage box from Hostbrr and it felt sooo slow. I didn't run any tests, but only running a simple File explorer App installed with Softaculous took a good amount of time for the UI page to load
    Thank you

    I just posted YABS on storage box. Take a look if interested!

    Thanked by 2PulsedMedia untitled
  • The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 3192431493

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • LET-5000MRR-BELL-RUNG-YABS #70810

    # ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## #
    #              Yet-Another-Bench-Script              #
    #                     v2026-10-31                    #
    # https://github.com/masonr/yet-another-bench-script #
    # ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## #
    
    Wed Nov 11 05:21:11 AM EET 2026
    
    Basic System Information:
    ---------------------------------
    Uptime     : 20 days, 21 hours, 33 minutes
    Processor  : AMD EPYC 7451 24-Core Processor
    CPU cores  : 16 @ 2295.686 MHz
    AES-NI     : ✔ Enabled
    VM-x/AMD-V : ✔ Enabled
    RAM        : 21.2 GiB
    Swap       : 975.0 MiB
    Disk       : 32.6 TiB
    Distro     : Debian GNU/Linux 12 (bookworm)
    Kernel     : 6.1.0-54-amd64
    VM Type    : KVM
    IPv4/IPv6  : ✔ Online / ❌ Offline
    
    IPv4 Network Information:
    ---------------------------------
    ISP        : Magna Capax Finland Oy
    ASN        : AS203003 Magna Capax Finland Oy
    Host       : Magna Capax Finland Oy
    Location   : Helsinki, Uusimaa (18)
    Country    : Finland
    
    fio Disk Speed Tests (Mixed R/W 50/50) (Partition /dev/sda):
    ---------------------------------
    Block Size | 4k            (IOPS) | 64k           (IOPS)
      ------   | ---            ----  | ----           ----
    Read       | 626.68 KB/s    (153) | 10.54 MB/s     (160)
    Write      | 658.43 KB/s    (160) | 11.02 MB/s     (168)
    Total      | 1.28 MB/s      (313) | 21.56 MB/s     (328)
               |                      |
    Block Size | 512k          (IOPS) | 1m            (IOPS)
      ------   | ---            ----  | ----           ----
    Read       | 38.06 MB/s      (72) | 54.96 MB/s      (52)
    Write      | 40.24 MB/s      (76) | 58.73 MB/s      (56)
    Total      | 78.31 MB/s     (148) | 113.70 MB/s    (108)
    
    iperf3 Network Speed Tests (IPv4):
    ---------------------------------
    Provider        | Location (Link)           | Send Speed      | Recv Speed      | Ping
    -----           | -----                     | ----            | ----            | ----
    Clouvider       | London, UK (10G)          | 5.71 Gbits/sec  | 6.84 Gbits/sec  | 33.6 ms
    Leaseweb        | Singapore, SG (10G)       | 4.47 Gbits/sec  | 6.09 Gbits/sec  | 174 ms
    Leaseweb        | NYC, NY, US (10G)         | 6.36 Gbits/sec  | 8.58 Gbits/sec  | 95.9 ms
    
    YABS completed in 4 min 6 sec
    
    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • DarkzooDarkzoo Member

    LET-5000MRR-BELL-RUNG-YABS #73864

    # ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## #
    #              Yet-Another-Bench-Script              #
    #                     v2026-10-31                    #
    # https://github.com/masonr/yet-another-bench-script #
    # ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## #
    
    Wed Nov 11 05:57:00 AM EET 2026
    
    Basic System Information:
    ---------------------------------
    Uptime     : 12 days, 11 hours, 59 minutes
    Processor  : AMD EPYC 7601 32-Core Processor
    CPU cores  : 24 @ 2195.872 MHz
    AES-NI     : ✔ Enabled
    VM-x/AMD-V : ✔ Enabled
    RAM        : 13.2 GiB
    Swap       : 7.0 GiB
    Disk       : 29.0 TiB
    Distro     : Debian GNU/Linux 12 (bookworm)
    Kernel     : 6.1.0-54-amd64
    VM Type    : KVM
    IPv4/IPv6  : ✔ Online / ❌ Offline
    
    IPv4 Network Information:
    ---------------------------------
    ISP        : Magna Capax Finland Oy
    ASN        : AS203003 Magna Capax Finland Oy
    Host       : Magna Capax Finland Oy
    Location   : Helsinki, Uusimaa (18)
    Country    : Finland
    
    Running fio random mixed R+W disk test with 512k block size..fio Disk Speed Tests (Mixed R/W 50/50) (Partition /dev/vda):
    ---------------------------------
    Block Size | 4k            (IOPS) | 64k           (IOPS)
      ------   | ---            ----  | ----           ----
    Read       | 3.09 MB/s      (755) | 10.80 MB/s     (164)
    Write      | 3.11 MB/s      (760) | 11.34 MB/s     (173)
    Total      | 6.21 MB/s     (1.5k) | 22.15 MB/s     (337)
               |                      |
    Block Size | 512k          (IOPS) | 1m            (IOPS)
      ------   | ---            ----  | ----           ----
    Read       | 100.85 MB/s    (192) | 114.26 MB/s    (108)
    Write      | 106.21 MB/s    (202) | 121.87 MB/s    (116)
    Total      | 207.06 MB/s    (394) | 236.14 MB/s    (224)
    
    iperf3 Network Speed Tests (IPv4):
    ---------------------------------
    Provider        | Location (Link)           | Send Speed      | Recv Speed      | Ping
    -----           | -----                     | ----            | ----            | ----
    Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Clouvider (Attempt #1 of Performing IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Clouvider (Attempt #1 oClouvider       | London, UK (10G)          | 3.57 Gbits/sec  | 5.12 Gbits/sec  | 30.0 ms
    Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Eranium (Attempt #1 of 3)Performing IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Eranium (Attempt #1 of Eranium         | Amsterdam, NL (100G)      | 7.45 Gbits/sec  | 12.9 Gbits/sec  | 32.3 ms
    Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Uztelecom (Attempt #1 of Performing IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Uztelecom (Attempt #1 oPerforming IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Uztelecom (Attempt #2 oPerforming IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Uztelecom (Attempt #3 oUztelecom       | Tashkent, UZ (10G)        | 107 Kbits/sec   | busy            | 95.6 ms
    Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Leaseweb (Attempt #1 of 3Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Leaseweb (Attempt #2 of 3Performing IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Leaseweb (Attempt #1 ofPerforming IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Leaseweb (Attempt #2 ofPerforming IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Leaseweb (Attempt #3 ofLeaseweb        | Singapore, SG (10G)       | busy            | busy            | 174 ms
    Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Clouvider (Attempt #1 of Performing IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Clouvider (Attempt #1 oPerforming IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Clouvider (Attempt #2 oPerforming IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Clouvider (Attempt #3 oClouvider       | Los Angeles, CA, US (10G) | 49.0 Kbits/sec  | busy            | 167 ms
    Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Leaseweb (Attempt #1 of 3Performing IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Leaseweb (Attempt #1 ofPerforming IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Leaseweb (Attempt #2 ofPerforming IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Leaseweb (Attempt #3 ofLeaseweb        | NYC, NY, US (10G)         | 60.8 Kbits/sec  | busy            | 96.1 ms
    Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Edgoo (Attempt #1 of 3)..Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Edgoo (Attempt #2 of 3)..Performing IPv4 iperf3 send test to Edgoo (Attempt #3 of 3)..Performing IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Edgoo (Attempt #1 of 3)Performing IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Edgoo (Attempt #2 of 3)Performing IPv4 iperf3 recv test from Edgoo (Attempt #3 of 3)Edgoo           | Sao Paulo, BR (1G)        | busy            | busy            | 221 ms
    
    YABS completed in 5 min 37 sec
    
    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • mp11mp11 Member

    The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 3864111938

    !!!!!! FOREVER ETERNAL BONUSES !!!!!!!

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • mp11mp11 Member

    The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 7995715617

    !!!!!! FOREVER ETERNAL BONUSES !!!!!!!

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 8283530638

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 5095802303

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • PulsedMediaPulsedMedia Member, Patron Provider

    @shons said:
    This might make someone laugh of course, but today I discovered the full power of a seedbox for myself! I didn't even think it would be such a bliss. Thank you! ;)

    you are welcome, share your full story with Väinämöinen so maybe that finds it's way to help others discover for themselves too :)

    @matheny said:

    @untitled said:
    Hi everybody,
    How is the transfer, read and write speed on the Storage Boxes 10G? Does anybody recommend them? Let's say in comparison with the one from Hetzner?
    I had a storage box from Hostbrr and it felt sooo slow. I didn't run any tests, but only running a simple File explorer App installed with Softaculous took a good amount of time for the UI page to load
    Thank you

    You get somewhere between 1mb/s and 100mb/s, random read latency between 100ms and 30s (yes, seconds), sometimes got oversold and have to move your account to another server because the server disk is full. Support is okay as long as the AI lord can fix your issue, otherwise good luck.

    Still they are the cheapest storage provider that I know of, some of 0.6-0.7 eur/tb/month if you have good account bonus.

    I have a bunch of their storage boxes and have 3 layers of caching on top to get acceptable performance, and have software to continuously measure each node performance and migrate things out if a box got worse.

    Not meant for performance. You want performance? Get seedbox. Simple as that. Or the I/O Priority slice upgrade. These are meant as glacial level storage, not for seedbox performance.

    Thanked by 1untitled
  • daveybobdaveybob Member

    The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 3695708554

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • PulsedMediaPulsedMedia Member, Patron Provider

    @joaquintlugones said:
    Well, I've tried posting here several times and never received any of the advertised bonuses. Not the two weeks, not the extra month.

    Bad.

    You have to post the correct ####s and follow the rules.

  • ZoldjinZoldjin Member

    The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 3055677403

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • LET-5000MRR-BELL-RUNG-YABS #74873

  • The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID:9998742144

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID:5743536365

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • tuxtux Veteran
    edited 1:14PM

    @PulsedMedia said:
    Not meant for performance. You want performance? Get seedbox. Simple as that. Or the I/O Priority slice upgrade. These are meant as glacial level storage, not for seedbox performance.

    LET-5000MRR-BELL-RUNG-YABS #74291

    Why seedbox speed is so slow?

    # ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## #
    #              Yet-Another-Bench-Script              #
    #                     v2026-10-31                    #
    # https://github.com/masonr/yet-another-bench-script #
    # ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## #
    
    Sun Nov  8 01:14:24 AM EET 2026
    
    Basic System Information:
    ---------------------------------
    Uptime     : 16 days, 3 hours, 12 minutes
    Processor  : Intel(R) N100
    CPU cores  : 4 @ 2179.845 MHz
    AES-NI     :  Enabled
    VM-x/AMD-V :  Enabled
    RAM        : 31.1 GiB
    Swap       : 54.7 GiB
    Disk       : 63.8 TiB
    Distro     : Debian GNU/Linux 12 (bookworm)
    Kernel     : 6.1.0-54-amd64
    VM Type    : NONE
    IPv4/IPv6  :  Online /  Offline
    
    IPv4 Network Information:
    ---------------------------------
    ISP        : Magna Capax Finland Oy
    ASN        : AS203003 Magna Capax Finland Oy
    Host       : Magnacapax
    Location   : Helsinki, Uusimaa (18)
    Country    : Finland
    
    fio Disk Speed Tests (Mixed R/W 50/50) (Partition /dev/md2):
    ---------------------------------
    Block Size | 4k            (IOPS) | 64k           (IOPS)
      ------   | ---            ----  | ----           ---- 
    Read       | 121.85 KB/s     (29) | 1.73 MB/s       (26)
    Write      | 131.07 KB/s     (32) | 1.89 MB/s       (28)
    Total      | 252.92 KB/s     (61) | 3.63 MB/s       (54)
               |                      |                     
    Block Size | 512k          (IOPS) | 1m            (IOPS)
      ------   | ---            ----  | ----           ---- 
    Read       | 13.82 MB/s      (26) | 25.18 MB/s      (24)
    Write      | 15.12 MB/s      (28) | 27.73 MB/s      (26)
    Total      | 28.94 MB/s      (54) | 52.91 MB/s      (50)
    
    iperf3 Network Speed Tests (IPv4):
    ---------------------------------
    Provider        | Location (Link)           | Send Speed      | Recv Speed      | Ping           
    -----           | -----                     | ----            | ----            | ----           
    Clouvider       | London, UK (10G)          | 2.04 Gbits/sec  | 347 Mbits/sec   | 33.4 ms        
    Eranium         | Amsterdam, NL (100G)      | 2.04 Gbits/sec  | 2.29 Gbits/sec  | 29.5 ms        
    Uztelecom       | Tashkent, UZ (10G)        | 2.05 Gbits/sec  | 700 Mbits/sec   | 95.6 ms        
    Leaseweb        | Singapore, SG (10G)       | 1.81 Gbits/sec  | 822 Mbits/sec   | 172 ms         
    Clouvider       | Los Angeles, CA, US (10G) | 968 Mbits/sec   | 349 Mbits/sec   | 168 ms         
    Leaseweb        | NYC, NY, US (10G)         | 1.94 Gbits/sec  | 241 Mbits/sec   | 96.1 ms        
    Edgoo           | Sao Paulo, BR (1G)        | busy            | busy            | 217 ms         
    
    Geekbench 6 Benchmark Test:
    ---------------------------------
    Test            | Value                         
                    |                               
    Single Core     | 881                           
    Multi Core      | 1316                          
    Full Test       | https://browser.geekbench.com/v6/cpu/19446096
    
    YABS completed in 17 min 47 sec
    
    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • KebabKebab Member
    edited 3:55PM

    The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 2342085471

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • KebabKebab Member
    edited 3:55PM

    The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 9593095814

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • KebabKebab Member

    The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 9030316034

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • mathenymatheny Member

    @PulsedMedia said: Not meant for performance. You want performance? Get seedbox. Simple as that. Or the I/O Priority slice upgrade. These are meant as glacial level storage, not for seedbox performance.

    To be clear I'm not complaining. I have (too) many of your storage boxes and I have a setup that works well for me. If people set right expectation then it's a pretty good deal given the price.

    I also have Sampo Trophy seedbox and perf doesn't seem to be much better either. Still no complain because it's <1eur/tb/month and have 100TB outbound traffic :)

  • PulsedMediaPulsedMedia Member, Patron Provider

    @matheny said:

    @PulsedMedia said: Not meant for performance. You want performance? Get seedbox. Simple as that. Or the I/O Priority slice upgrade. These are meant as glacial level storage, not for seedbox performance.

    To be clear I'm not complaining. I have (too) many of your storage boxes and I have a setup that works well for me. If people set right expectation then it's a pretty good deal given the price.

    I also have Sampo Trophy seedbox and perf doesn't seem to be much better either. Still no complain because it's <1eur/tb/month and have 100TB outbound traffic :)

    Then you have the offer for load balance on the Sampo Trophy. Use it if you want performance.

    Even with all the fancy controls, we still cannot predict what kind of usage each user has so on fast sales periods some servers will end up being rather ... sluggish for a period of time. It's been the case for 16 years now, and i don't see that changing unless we go for mega 1000 drive Ceph cluster.

  • PulsedMediaPulsedMedia Member, Patron Provider

    @TandM said:

    @XEOVO said:
    Ticket #391225. Dedicated server has been down for over a week.

    Uh oh, trying to get a human to look at your problem in case the AI bot isn't able to help out, is a known way to get permabanned by this provider.

    You get banned if you abuse the system and try to circumvent the process, to get a different answer than what is possible.

    We have customers to protect who also want support. You waste our resources just because you didn't like the answer, robbing other people from said resources? Yea GTFO.

    It's the same with server resources, physical resources. Just because you want infinite money, does not make you entitled to infinite money neither. Neither does it make you entitled to rob other customers of staff attention.

  • TandMTandM Member

    @PulsedMedia said:

    @TandM said:

    @XEOVO said:
    Ticket #391225. Dedicated server has been down for over a week.

    Uh oh, trying to get a human to look at your problem in case the AI bot isn't able to help out, is a known way to get permabanned by this provider.

    You get banned if you abuse the system and try to circumvent the process, to get a different answer than what is possible.

    We have customers to protect who also want support. You waste our resources just because you didn't like the answer, robbing other people from said resources? Yea GTFO.

    It's the same with server resources, physical resources. Just because you want infinite money, does not make you entitled to infinite money neither. Neither does it make you entitled to rob other customers of staff attention.

    If the service people pay you for doesn't work, they're entitled to you getting off your ass and fixing it.

  • The Eternal Bonus ORDER ID: 5917762995

    Thanked by 1PulsedMedia
  • PulsedMediaPulsedMedia Member, Patron Provider

    @TandM said:

    @PulsedMedia said:

    @TandM said:

    @XEOVO said:
    Ticket #391225. Dedicated server has been down for over a week.

    Uh oh, trying to get a human to look at your problem in case the AI bot isn't able to help out, is a known way to get permabanned by this provider.

    You get banned if you abuse the system and try to circumvent the process, to get a different answer than what is possible.

    We have customers to protect who also want support. You waste our resources just because you didn't like the answer, robbing other people from said resources? Yea GTFO.

    It's the same with server resources, physical resources. Just because you want infinite money, does not make you entitled to infinite money neither. Neither does it make you entitled to rob other customers of staff attention.

    If the service people pay you for doesn't work, they're entitled to you getting off your ass and fixing it.

    They are entitled to standard support, under standard rules. Not special little princess treatment.

  • TandMTandM Member

    @PulsedMedia said:

    @TandM said:

    @PulsedMedia said:

    @TandM said:

    @XEOVO said:
    Ticket #391225. Dedicated server has been down for over a week.

    Uh oh, trying to get a human to look at your problem in case the AI bot isn't able to help out, is a known way to get permabanned by this provider.

    You get banned if you abuse the system and try to circumvent the process, to get a different answer than what is possible.

    We have customers to protect who also want support. You waste our resources just because you didn't like the answer, robbing other people from said resources? Yea GTFO.

    It's the same with server resources, physical resources. Just because you want infinite money, does not make you entitled to infinite money neither. Neither does it make you entitled to rob other customers of staff attention.

    If the service people pay you for doesn't work, they're entitled to you getting off your ass and fixing it.

    They are entitled to standard support, under standard rules. Not special little princess treatment.

    Yeah, just hope the ChatBBW bot doesn't conk out and leave them with a paid for service that doesn't work for however long, I guess, because asking the TEMU BOFH just gets you permabanned.

  • @PulsedMedia said:

    @TandM said:

    @PulsedMedia said:

    @TandM said:

    @XEOVO said:
    Ticket #391225. Dedicated server has been down for over a week.

    Uh oh, trying to get a human to look at your problem in case the AI bot isn't able to help out, is a known way to get permabanned by this provider.

    You get banned if you abuse the system and try to circumvent the process, to get a different answer than what is possible.

    We have customers to protect who also want support. You waste our resources just because you didn't like the answer, robbing other people from said resources? Yea GTFO.

    It's the same with server resources, physical resources. Just because you want infinite money, does not make you entitled to infinite money neither. Neither does it make you entitled to rob other customers of staff attention.

    If the service people pay you for doesn't work, they're entitled to you getting off your ass and fixing it.

    They are entitled to standard support, under standard rules. Not special little princess treatment.

    You know, i was always mindful to stay far away from your work of art here.
    But you might have missed todays developments.

    Today, the European Commission presented its Proposal for a Digital Fairness Act (DFA)

    Article 25
    Communication with a human being in customer service
    Where a trader provides online customer service after the conclusion of a contract, the trader
    shall ensure that, upon request of the consumer and when other means are not effective,
    communication with a human being is made available.
    This Article shall not apply to investment services as defined in point (2) of Article 4(1) of
    Directive 2014/65/EU.
    

    So, sadly, my entertainment will most likely cease in the future. I will really miss your shenanigans

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