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due to what kind of abuse? which type of attacks are we speaking?
Most vps providers wont help if its unmanaged. if you are saying someone else abusing the resources which affects the other nodes/vps then in this case go for KVM VPS, all resources will be dedicated to you just the speed will be shared but it prevents what you said CPU load etc.
Choosing a provider is some thing you have to select and the requirement you want from the VPS.
I assume your on the OpenVZ virtualization VPS so having KVM is advantages over openVZ.
Talking about monitoring , you can find under the kvm-node monitor stats URL if your provider has a tools for it. otherwise you can opt for 3rd party tools to monitor it.
It can range from being as simple as observing the output of "top" to as complex as evaluating an strace. More would need to be known about your stack and it's configuration to make a deeper assumption.
I mean all mentioned above - pretty hard to properly configure and achieve, just need to start from something and grow experience.
What about monitoring, depends on your case and scenario, there are many monitoring tools with triggers and notifications
Without additional information impossible to tell what exactly needs to do.
Very good suggestion, thanks for your answer.
look in their garden
This can be solved with InfluxDB and Grafana, I'm already implementing the plan, thank you.
You are a provider, or a subcriber to a third party?
If the former, it all starts with verification of user information when they subscribe and a comprehensive acceptable use policy. Allowing crypto just invites abuse IMHO.
Publish a list of abusers.
Ask Santa Claus to put them on the naughty list if they don't change their behavior.
Example
If you see your IP address below, please stop hiding in the shadows and attacking my website.
Come out and let's duel at dawn.
If you are an enduser; I highly reccomend CSF firewall and if you are running on php then CIDRAM: Classless Inter-Domain Routing Access Manager.
Setup an IDS/IPS solution along with firewall or use a NextGen Firewall if your budget permits.