So what has been the weirdest demand you have been confronted with by a customer?

jar

Letzien said: The only way I could see this even being plausible would be if someone was sexting someone else and got their picture put up on a "revenge" website. I still think this leads to trying to handle it themselves- rather than go to the proper channels, but otherwise the mind boggles how the hell this would even happen.

"Hey that content which is illegal to possess and distribute, I am formally declaring ownership of it."

Letzien

@jar said:

Letzien said: The only way I could see this even being plausible would be if someone was sexting someone else and got their picture put up on a "revenge" website. I still think this leads to trying to handle it themselves- rather than go to the proper channels, but otherwise the mind boggles how the hell this would even happen.

"Hey that content which is illegal to possess and distribute, I am formally declaring ownership of it."

You mean it wasn't a request sent by the person themselves asking to have a picture taken down? I guess I have far too much faith in people.

dragon2611

@jackb said:

@stefeman said:
Certain middle eastern gentleman ordered a 4 core VPS with 8 GB RAM and opened a ticket shortly after where he asked if the server was halal, and if not, do we provide halal servers.

The server was stunned and hung upside down before being racked. Technician made sure to not eat bacon for breakfast.

We accidentally racked a 1U machine upside down once, was an old HP and since we weren't running it at the time we couldn't be bothered to fix it so it stayed that way for quite a while.

smile

@dragon2611 said:

@jackb said:

@stefeman said:
Certain middle eastern gentleman ordered a 4 core VPS with 8 GB RAM and opened a ticket shortly after where he asked if the server was halal, and if not, do we provide halal servers.

The server was stunned and hung upside down before being racked. Technician made sure to not eat bacon for breakfast.

We accidentally racked a 1U machine upside down once, was an old HP and since we weren't running it at the time we couldn't be bothered to fix it so it stayed that way for quite a while.

Not even worth mentioning. Some kids in college had their desktops upside down and even use the dvd player upside down.

WebProject

the best customer request we had is customer purchased unmanaged VPS service (under £10) and expected full managed with proactive monitoring

Letzien

@WebProject said:
the best customer request we had is customer purchased unmanaged VPS service (under £10) and expected full managed with proactive monitoring

That's a day that ends in Y.

WebProject

@mikho said:
A customer signed up with obvious fake information, name and street address where one (1) character long. Also using an IP from another hosting provider (ie VPN).

Got stuck in maxmind and immediately opened a ticket that I should allow that person to order.
I answered no and that person demanded to have his/her personal information removed.

its a standard orders nowadays, who care about the terms and conditions?

eol

Dearest @ehab

After some hours of thinking about it I am convinced I can't do a #1 or not even a top 30 for that matter, there is just so much awesome talent but I recently stumbled (again) upon a great piece I admire for it's perfection.

With warmest regards,
eol.

TimboJones

@HostDoc said:
That is hilarious.
In all honesty, what is so hard about using a blue pen to draw a red line?

Moving on... @ehab

Our weirdest and funniest request was a client who wanted a server in New york or close by.
We did not have a USA location at this point and it was pointed out to the client. They asked for alternatives. All of our locations as well as looking glass was provided.
Client idled for 2 hours.
Came back to live chat and once again requested a server in New York.
Canada was suggested or a different host as we did not have a US presence.
Client leaves.
Client comes back 2 days later and request a New york server. It was re-iterated to him that we do not have that location.
They proceeded to argue that live chat informed them that New York will be back in stock in a few days. ?? .
Client leaves.
Client returned a few hours later and purchases a server in Finland.
Client leaves.
Client returned a few hours later and purchases a server in Finland.
Client leaves.
Client returned a few hours later and purchases a server in UK.
Client leaves.
Client returns the next day, this time with their name displayed (as they now have services) and request a server in New York.
We go through the same dance and inform them about their Finland and UK instances.
Client says, no, they do not need servers in Europe just New York.
We attempt to continue chatting but client leaves.
A few days later, client returns and asks about our UK node, specs etc. We mention they already have one, why not just use that to get direct answers.
Client denies having a service or account with us even though they are signed in.
Client leaves.
Client returns a few hours later accusing us of fraud and theft. That we had accessed their paypal and purchased services. Client demands a refund and informs us he will sue us and change his PP password.
Client is still within refund period so we process refund for all 3 VPS minus the gateway fee's.
Client opens dispute for the fee's.
Client return the next day requesting VPS in New York and proceeds to purchase a Canada VPS despite being told he could no longer purchase a service from us.
Client pays for service and it is auto provisioned.
It is immediately terminated and refunded minus gateway fee.
Client opens dispute for gateway fee.
We block the IP and close the account.
Client comes back with a VPN IP and ask about New York servers. We ignore the request and block the IP.
Client returns and goes straight to purchase a Canada VPS on an annual plan.
Client stupidly registers under their name again but different email address and we still missed it until fraudrecord was checked and we saw our own entry.
Client VPS is immediately terminated.
Client goes straight to paypal and request a chargeback.
We escalate straight to paypal and provide transcripts of all chats, invoices, tickets and anything relevant to the claim.
A week or so later, we win.
We minused admin fee, all the other disputed gateway fee's and refund the client the rest.

Have not seen or heard from this mysterious New York VPS seeker since. Not even a thank you for the money we won but refunded what was not ours.

FFS, it would have been less hassle to open a DC in New York.

At some point, you should ask if they require adult supervision to use their computer.

dfroe

Hm, do providers also count?

Today I complained about a dying hard disk in one of my dedicated servers. Smartmon mailed me about current pending sectors and i/o requests started to result in errors.

Datacenter staff comes back with:

We are sorry for the inconveniences.

We have tested both disks. The are just fine:

smartctl -a /dev/sg0
[ long output of smartctl ]
[...]
197 Current_Pending_Sector [...] 0
[...]

1 Short offline Completed without error 00% 44763 -

2 Extended offline Completed without error 00% 44533 -

smartctl -a /dev/sg1
[ yet another long output of smartctl ]
[...]
197 Current_Pending_Sector [...] 4
[...]

1 Short offline Completed: read failure 90% 43569 [...]

2 Extended offline Completed: read failure 80% 43565 [...]

[...]

Due to automatic formatting of the ticket system being used, the lines beginning with 1, 2, .. were actually printed in bold letters. The extended tests were performed by me, the short tests afterwards by datacenter staff.
But yeah, everything is just fine..
Some others might rather say, the end is nigh.

Letzien

We've all fucked up on the job once or twice, but someone really fucking phoned that one in.

Chuck

Jeff Bezos usually is confronted by pulling his dick in front of customers.

https://theslot.jezebel.com/everyone-reportedly-leaked-jeff-bezoss-dick-pics-1832560010

Letzien

@Chuck said:
Jeff Bezos usually is confronted by pulling his dick in front of customers.

https://theslot.jezebel.com/everyone-reportedly-leaked-jeff-bezoss-dick-pics-1832560010

That's what we can a 'forward' approach.

Clouvider

@FR_Michael said:
Former customer requested to delete all existing data regarding to gdpr. After we confirmed that he requested a copy of all his data and wanted to sue us cause we can't provide the copy or even knew who he was.

Had one of this as well. Customer felt incredibly offended and implied we’re mocking him as we only spoke 5 minutes ago...